Sep 19, 2011

To the hurting She...

(To the woman shaken. Not because of the quake and not because of the defeat at Old Trafford! )

I wish I could take away that heaviness in your heart right now. My heart aches with every tear you roughly wipe away with the back of your hand, smudging those well-lined eyes! My soul weeps to hear you say his name with a trembling voice on the verge of a breakdown.

I wish I knew the right words to say, the right thing to do to somehow ease that pain eating you alive. I wish trashing the name of the one who breaks your heart would somehow help it heal. But then, I also know it won't. It makes me smile with an ache in my heart because I know that if I even go verbal against him, you'll be the first person to defend him. 

We are such suckers in love, aren't we? Isn't it funny that we, self-proclaimed independent women, are such huge marshmallows when it comes to the matters of the heart? Isn't it so much like us to get our hearts broken over and over by the same person over the same silly thing? Isn't it a lot like us to forgive but only to be deceived all over again? Isn't it unfair that some people always end up taking advantage of us? Isn't it in our nature to give, give and give untill we have nothing left to give? Isn't it like us to always hesitate before we take something from someone else, no matter how negligible that something is? And worse, isn't it so much like us to always be the one hurting in the end? 

How can it be that we somehow always let people close enough to hurt us, despite the many times that we have been broken before? What happened to the walls that we've built? Or have we really built them at all? Have our concern and our decision to be carers (despite being broken ourselves) stood in the way of the completion of those protective walls? How can it be that smart women like us can be so dumb all at the same time? 

Are we not the prized daughters of our families?? I still remember your Mum beaming with pride that last time she visited you. Your Dad, I know, believes he has the most responsible daughter in the world. I agree with him. He does. Your sister knows that you deserve the very best while your baby brother believes that there is no one in the world good enough for you. There are dozens of men who would throw themselves on the path of a bullet for you. Yet here we cry, all because of one man and his complications.

I don't want to ask the same question again. Is he worth it?

I don't know the answer, you don't either.

But like we said, virtuous women like us, sometimes just don't have the world at their feet. Yet, we always choose to  be the bigger person and the more-patient partner. We always choose love over hate and trust over doubt. We always make the decision to do the right thing.

But when it comes to the matters of the heart, we are, but, the ultimate fools!!

My only hope is that one day, we'll look back, and it'll all make sense. Why we always love no matter what? Why we always give multiple second chances? Why we always choose to trust, no matter how bad the track record is?

But until that day comes. We'll always do the right thing and continue being fools.

I sure hope that day comes soon enough...






9 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is a Hurting He writing:
It's funny (not really), but I was dumped by a woman for the first time in my life only three days ago! I shouldnt say this, but it hurts! And nobody around to "take away the heaviness in my heart". Today I got a text message that said "Why are you giving up on me?" Can someone please advice this poor man if there is a manual for understanding women?Thank you. E

Senmami said...

To the Hurting he..

I'm sorry, we don't come with a munual. Relationship, I guess, is one thing that we need a lifetime to learn! All the best with yours.

Anonymous said...

I'm sure she has her side of the story too. Had she given up, she wouldn't have sent an SOS text three days later. Word of advice: Never take any loved one for granted because at the end of the day, we all want the same things-- comfort, love and a peaceful heart.

That said, it is also never about a definite sex. Sometimes its a he, sometimes a she. So dear Mr. E, welcome to the club :((

Anonymous said...

Her side of the story? Pathetic! I clicked "like" far too often on her cousin's Facebook posts! She didn't like that! I only did it out of... respect. She skinned me alive! I bet if her cousin was ugly we would still be together! Women...!!! How shall we call our Club, dear Anonymous? Regards, E

Senmami said...

Wow! Getting interesting @E and Anonymous. And I thought I was the only one! There must be three sides to every story!

Anonymous said...

Three sides...? Even four sides! A woman's imagination knows no boundaries! Breaking News: I have apologized with a very sweet text message this morning! Her reply: "On April 21st you clicked "like" on D's post! Why did you do that? No wonder I cannot sleep! I hate you!"
Time for another beer, I guess! Or THAT manual...

Anonymous said...

Forgot to sign my last comment: E (wink)

Senmami said...

Haven't had such a hearty laugh in a long time!Wonder how old is ur gf?

True.. a woman's imagination knows no boundaries.

Enjoy ur beer untill we write a manual! bwahahahah

ku2 said...

Have just come across this one. Love the post- My friends and I too have been thru the same thing and it makes us wonder-do nice girls and guys truly finish last?
And even more entertained by the comments :D